Dr Pam Spurr

Increase Your Sex-quota At Christmas!

Here are some tips to put the sizzle back into the season and increase your sex-quota at Christmas-

* Let's begin with the basics: whether you're in a relationship or have just met someone new make sure you carve out time for a couple hot dates. These should be sacrosanct, and no last-minute party invite, or extra Christmas drinks with colleagues should get in the way. Couples complain to me they don't have enough time for sex in the run-up to Christmas. And people who’ve just met each other say their new relationship has stalled because they don't have enough "get to know each other" time.

* Set the mood: don't miss out on a daily dose of flirting! As the demands of December get tougher it’ll only take you a moment to ring her for a flirty chat, text her something suggestive, or e-mail her a compliment like how gorgeous she looked there last time you met up.

* You only need a few minutes a day of sensuality to keep things ticking over between you. Be affectionate and use any moment you can to caress her - sexy touching releases the bonding hormone oxytocin in her system so she feels loved-up around you. Let your touch linger over some of her erogenous zones - even with her clothes on feeling your fingertips lightly brush the small of her back, her bottom or even her breasts will get her wanting more!

* Suggest a festive frolic - as long as you know she'll be up for one! Squeeze a quickie in - the perfect excuse for both of you to do things you know turn each other on. Think about the move that always gets her aroused - maybe it's a specific way you circle her clitoris with your fingertips - these moves will be guaranteed to make a quickie successful! And for an extra thrill have this quickie at a friend’s Christmas party where you two sneak off to the bathroom together.

*Make sure you hang some mistletoe in critical places in your flat if she's coming over to visit - or if you live with each other. Women hate the fact that as you get to know a man so often they stop kissing you. Try an old-fashioned movie star style kiss - wrap one arm around her waist and gently take her chin with your other hand and press your lips together sensually -but not with too much pressure! Then allow your tongue to relax and begin to gently probe inside her mouth.

*Getting ready for a Christmas party together? Offer to soap her down while she luxuriates in warm sudsy water. Take each hand one at a time and gently caress it with a face cloth. Then do the same to her feet before you gently stroke her erogenous zones with the face cloth. Who knows, you may not get out to the party after all!

* Get creative with Christmas items - is there any soft, velvety ribbon around for wrapping gifts that you can use to tie your hers wrists together for a bit of bondage-play? Then go for it but always tie things in a bow rather than a knot.

*Or are there some lovely mince pies, Christmas cakes and biscuits that you can use for a sexy feast? Then put those things to be good use by rumbling them over her breasts and tummy and gently flick off the crumbs with your tongue. Then go for some extra erotic festive fun and drizzle a little bit of sparkling wine or champagne between her legs. Take your time to savour every drop as you gently probe her clitoris and labia with your lips and tongue.

Using just a few of these will set the season sizzling and Christmas-proof your sex life - enjoy!