Dr Pam Spurr

"Couple time" at the weekend is crucial!

"Couple time" at the weekend is crucial! Questions and answers

1 Why is it important to relax at the weekend? 

Stress has become endemic in our lives and the only real quality time many couples can manage is at the weekend. It's terribly important to take advantage of this, do the minimum of necessary household chores and put the others to one side, and then plan together how best to use your free time. It's a good habit to treat it like any other part of your life that you slot into your diary - this is your time to rekindle and nurture your relationship!

2 Why is it important to have time without the kids but in the home?

Many couples become so child-focused in their lives that they forget about themselves as individuals who need intimate time and can remain sexually charged lovers. Quite frankly your children will be happier if you nurture your relationship and they see loving parents who are affectionate towards each other.

3 Why is it good to have time in the morning? eg, less tired than if out on a Saturday date night.

As long as you've had a reasonable quality of sleep, the morning is when you’ll both be recharged. Research shows we have the most sexual interest when we have the energy to fuel our libido.

4 Is there anything different about our bodies in the morning? eg, hormone levels that make you open to bonding, sex, relaxation, etc.

Many men experience a testostorone peak in the morning that is why they have their "morning glory" erections. Even if a woman doesn't experience an equivalent hormonal peak at that time (though some do) if she's well rested she can enjoy the delights of what his hormonal peak has to offer!

5 What should you/shouldn't you do in this couple of hours together on a Sunday morning?

Once you've carved out your "breakfast in bed” time agree at packed that certain sex-interest, passion killing topics are off limits. No moaning about your job, no fretting about your children, no complaints about your families, etc. Ultimately our minds are our biggest sex organ. If they’re packed full of worries, frustrations and issues they’ll switch right off of sexual enjoyment. This is also the time to introduce little sensuous surprises like slipping into something sexy and attractive, suggesting you both shower together before going back to bed, and having a new sex technique in mind try out.

6 Any tips for keeping this mood going throughout the week?

You can keep this “breakfast in bed” vibe going throughout the week by flirting with each other in the smallest ways - send that sexy text, leave them a loving note, compliment each other, help each other with the daily routine, and tell each other why you love them.