Dr Pam Spurr

Some top dating tips!

Some top dating tips!

The best dating tip I have is every time you meet a man, in whatever circumstances, to pretend that it’s a speed date! So whether you bump into him in the lift at work, in a coffee shop, at your gym, or when out with girlfriends you’ll give it your best as you’ve only got three minutes to impress. With what I call the ‘speed date mentality’ you tend to seize the moment and grab chances to chat someone up. 

How do you get this mentality?

1/ By believing you’re the best! Become a bit of an actress and pretend you’re irresistible. You’ll start believing you’re as hot as your favourite female icon. What ‘X’ factor does she have that makes her so irresistible?  Visualise having this ‘X’ factor.

2/ Next, think about the one thing you do when you’re nervous, e.g., do you play with your hair or hands? Take a moment to focus on you with out these nervous little giveaways. Once you’re focussed you’re less likely to fall back on nervous and distracting habits that put a new man off.

3/ Just like in speed dating where you have to be prepared with a few questions to kick things off, plan a few conversational hooks to avoid deadly silences. be ready to chat about things that’ll give you real info about him, e.g., rather than asking what his job entails, ask what he likes most about his work.

4/ Dressing for success is crucial – if you run out with no make-up and in your greying, over-washed track suit you’re bound to clock a gorgeous guy and feel you can’t flash him a smile.

5/ If you fancy the man you’ve just met in your gym, at the pub etc., pull out the stops! By giving clear messages that you fancy him, he’s more than likely to respond positively. You’ll appear far more attractive using flirting ploys like loads of smiles and laughing at his jokes. You’ll create what I call a ‘comfort zone’ – where he feels good around you and will want to have more!