Fireflies and fireplaces...
The grey icy mist outside my office window makes me feel like hibernating - but I can’t - along with millions of others I'm working until Christmas eve. Some of my family are already off work as of today - lucky so-and-so’s!
Today I’m loving Owl City’s track Fireflies - hauntingly beautiful, romantic and tender plus it mentions ‘dreaming’ - a subject close to my heart.
Putting me in the mood for my agony slot on Tom Dunne’s Dublin News talk show after 11. A couple of the questions that listeners are asking me this week include a man in his 40s who is the commitmentphobe but would like to settle down.
And a woman whose best friend's husband is giving her the cold shoulder. It's awful when that 'dynamic' happens - a common explanation is that the partner feels that they’re getting less time with their partner then the friend is. They want to elbow the friend out of the way and it's a form of envy.
This can so easily happen - maybe her friend has been depending on her for whatever reason recently - and so her friend’s husband feels a bit disgruntled and out of the loop
But just as common an explanation is that a friend's partner is simply going through a bad time and gives off negative vibes around everyone - but it feels personal if you are the best friend.
TODAY’S THOUGHT: if you're in a three-way relationship like this (and I don't mean THAT type of three-way you cheeky person!)- i.e. a good friend has a partner and you feel you're getting the cold shoulder from their partner - think about whether you have come between them in some way. Or if it could be their partner’s struggling with issues and you feel their negativity when you're around your friend.
Don't say anything to your friend, like that their partner’s treating you badly (unless they ARE treating you really badly rather than just being a bit stressy 'round you). Analyse the situation a bit and then if you need to have a quiet but positive word with your friend. Tell them that you like their partner, and you've always got on with them, but you wonder why they act a bit stressed around you.
Loved seeing my old radio producer last night - the two fireplaces were alight in the Century Club where we had drinks and dinner. We could see the snowflakes falling outside the big window. And we shared a lot of anecdotes from the past and where we are now.
Off to one of my oldest friend’s Christmas drinks thing tonight - it's always low-key - come as you are and dip into the buffet. No high heels and glammed-up dresses tonight!
Try and enjoy a quiet moment today (we all need one!), love, Pam X