Someone gossiping about you?
I've tackled the issue of gossip before in articles but want to mention it today as I had a couple recent e-mails into my agony aunt mailbag about this.
These e-mails were from people who were very distressed by gossip going around about them at work. Not only was the gossip untrue but it was spreading like wildfire.
My advice is always to go through the HR department in these extreme circumstances. But if you can - in less extreme circumstances - tackle the person who started the gossip first-hand. This can be far better for your confidence and clearing the air.
TODAY’S TIP: if you're tackling someone you have to be in control. If they're a gossip by nature they may also be quite manipulative and try and turn the conversation back on you.
Be prepared - super prepared for this conversation! Have your facts straight, have them written down - for instance, who told you that you were being gossiped about and when it was drawn to your attention.
Don't be bullied by them into backing down. If you don't get a promise that they'll retract what they've said, and that they'll make sure the people they've gossiped to know that it wasn't true, then you’ll have to take it to your manager.
Sometimes these things are best sorted out face-to-face - but as I said in extreme cases it's best to go through HR.
If you're in this situation I'm sending you the best of luck - and I'm sending it to the people who e-mailed me about this.
Remember I appreciate all your e-mails [on my homepage at "e-mail me here"] but as I work full time I simply can't reply to them all as much as I'd love to.
I'm now off until September 28th in the States visiting family and on some business.
Back here on the 28th and wishing you a wonderful few weeks.
Look after yourself, Pamx